The one thing I have struggled the most with in the past few years is my inability to let go. At the root of all my fears and anxieties lies my inability to let go of myself. My ego, to be exact.
When one is carrying something heavy that is weighing down on the individual, the easiest thing to do is to simply let go of the grip and let go of the weight. It is easy. Simply release and let go of the object. Gravity does the rest of the work. It takes no strength at all to let go of a heavy object.
In fact, it takes physical strength to hold onto that heavy object. Letting go is the easy part.
But when it comes to matters of the Self, letting go is the hardest thing to do.
It takes real strength to do so. Strength that most people don't have. Strength that most people are unwilling to summon from deep within.
I used to think that people who are humble and meek are simply weak. That they are not strong enough to stand up to others or call attention to themselves.
It is counter intuitive, really.
Meekness, when translated from its ancient word origin, actually means "controlled strength".
No wonder I've been having trouble letting go of my ego. I am simply not strong enough yet to let go. I try but I fail.
After all, it takes real strength to let go of the ego. It takes real strength to be humble and meek.
Just ask Jesus.
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